Trying Not To Listen

26 Sep 2012 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , , ,

My Dark PassengerThe Dark Passenger is being rather vocal at the moment. My decision to deal with the current situation by letting things lie is giving him plenty of scope to come up with all manner of unhelpful thoughts.

I’m giving him as good as I’m getting, but the chap is just so very inventive. Last night he had the brilliant idea of putting a song in my head, and now I just can’t stop humming, whistling or singing it.

What is more annoying, is that it’s probably one of my favourite songs, and very, very well known.

Remember this? …

Hello darkness, my old friend
I’ve come to talk with you again
Because a vision softly creeping
Left its seeds while I was sleeping
And the vision that was planted in my brain
Still remains
Within the sound of silence

In restless dreams I walked alone
Narrow streets of cobblestone
‘Neath the halo of a street lamp
I turned my collar to the cold and damp
When my eyes were stabbed by the flash of a neon light
That split the night
And touched the sound of silence

And in the naked light I saw
Ten thousand people, maybe more
People talking without speaking
People hearing without listening
People writing songs that voices never share
And no one dared
Disturb the sound of silence

“Fools”, said I, “You do not know
Silence like a cancer grows
Hear my words that I might teach you
Take my arms that I might reach you”
But my words, like silent raindrops fell
And echoed
In the wells of silence

And the people bowed and prayed
To the neon god they made
And the sign flashed out its warning
In the words that it was forming
And the sign said, “The words of the prophets are written on the subway walls
And tenement halls”
And whispered in the sounds of silence

If things don’t improve, I may have to arrange an appointment to see Cecilia, though on second thoughts, remembering her lyrics, I can’t see it helping much. Back to the chanting me thinks.

Challenges, Just A Fact Of Life

16 Aug 2012 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , , , , , , ,

Just A Fact Of LifeSometimes, problems, or as we like to call them, challenges, seem to just keep on coming, one after another after another. With two deaths, as well as other problems associated with dementia in the family happening in the past few weeks, it’s been all too easy for us to start to wonder ‘What on earth have we done to deserve all this?’

However, challenges are just a fact of life. It’s true that some people seem to have more challenges than others. It is also obvious that there are times when they appear to come along like buses, nothing for ages and then a bunch of them turn up at once.

What helps, or at least helps me, is to look upon them as a way to become stronger. Buddhism sees challenges as a way to strengthen your faith and your practice by turning their poison into medicine. Of course this is easier said than done, but over time it is amazing what a person can learn to deal with.

When a challenge rears its ugly head I try to think about it from a number of viewpoints. Chanting definitely helps me in this regard. While I’m chanting Nam Myoho Renge Kyo, my mind is emptied of the minutia of daily life, so I can concentrate on the issue at hand. Finding the positives in a situation is never easy, but they are there if you care to look.

So even though things may look dark, that there is nothing but sorrow to be gained from some event, that really is not the case. Losing someone close may seem to be such a situation, but if that person was suffering, that suffering has now ended, which is positive. If someone has to go into care, that is very sad, but it means that they, and others, are safer in the process.

Whatever the situation, there are positives, all that is needed is to find them in amongst the morass of bad feelings we may be having. As I say, chanting allows me to do this, and although it may not work for you, giving it a chance certainly won’t make things worse. Having a really good chant raises my life-energy and life-state and that in turn makes me more able to confront things head on.

Variety, The Spice Of Life-State

10 Aug 2012 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , , , , ,

Bristol International Balloon FiestaWe’ve talked about the Ten Worlds on many occasions, from Hell to Enlightenment, they are all part of the average day. So when I woke up this morning, having finally drifted off around 2 o’clock, I was in a bit of a state, though I’m not quite sure whether it was Hell or Tranquillity, but either way it was certainly not going to help me get through the day.

Speaking to Bumble on the way to work, I was a bit quiet, a bit negative, for me, and I’m sure she picked up on it. Tiredness, a general lack of life-energy, can really set you back. Not that I’m prone to it on the whole, but it gets the better of us all now and then.

Fortunately, my degree of self-awareness is certainly improving. So having worked out that I was the living embodiment of The Grinch, I had to make  change, so I took myself off to the peace and quiet of the stream at the back of the office and had a good chant.

Not wishing to blow the trumpet for Nichiren Buddhism too loudly, it is amazing that the simple repetition of Nam Myoho Renge Kyo for ten minutes can completely transform your mood and, consequently your whole day.

We’ve got Josie and Matt, Bumble’s daughter and her partner, coming to stay for the weekend. I’m really looking forward to seeing her again, it’s been a while as she’s currently living and working on the Scilly Isles, and to meeting Matt for the first time.

I know that Bumble has planned, and prepared, a veggie curry for this evening and we are going to watch the Bristol balloon fiesta tomorrow, weather permitting. I think a picnic at the top of Tog Hill, one of the highest points in the area, should give us a great view and mean we won’t be involved in the traffic jam that accompanies the event.

So getting myself into a great mood, buzzing with life-force and energy, has to be the best way to set us all up for a busy weekend. With more chanting between now and tomorrow afternoon, I’ll be right on song and full of beans. Bring on the chanting, bring on the weekend !!!

Nam Myoho Renge Kyo

Just Deserts

07 Aug 2012 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , , , , , ,

Mr Worry - Don't Do ItLeaving the works PC in a dishevelled state last night was not good for my peace of mind. But my fears of being left with an unusable machine for a week while Dan ‘the man’ went off to Barcelona on holiday proved to be unfounded.

With a laudable effort on all parts, particularly Dan’s, the machine is now honed to perfection and all ready to take on the challenges of the Fraser’s website restyling. Much of the work has already been done, all that is needed, and I say ‘all’ reservedly, is to incorporate said changes into the working copy, iron out any bugs and publish it to the server.

Worrying about things is such a pointless exercise. It takes energy, it lowers your life-state and achieves absolutely nothing. So don’t do it, I tell myself, but that’s easier said than done sometimes. What does work, and it works every time, is making the causes to create the effects we wish to see.

So as the old war-time song went, ‘what’s the use of worrying, it never was worthwhile; so, pack up your troubles in your old kit back and smile, smile, smile’. In my case that happens to be a rather battered old shoulder bag, but the principle still holds true.

Day And Night, Night And Day

26 Jun 2012 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , , , ,

Recharge The BatteriesBeing responsible for the smooth running of our websites is a barrel load of laughs at times. In the last few days, we have been getting service outage alerts about every fifteen minutes from the company that monitors the sites for us. Whilst it is good to know that something is amiss, once you know about it, and know that there is rather little that can be done internally, it all gets a little ‘old news’.

Challenges are put before us to test us. To allow us to take up that challenge and work with it to make ourselves stronger. When, however, that challenge goes on day and night for days on end, your spirits start to flag as you begin to feel the lack of decent sleep taking hold.

This is where the Nichiren secret weapon of Nam Myoho Renge Kyo comes in handy. Chanting really does boost the energy levels and puts a spring back in your step. By my reckoning, half an hours chanting, at lunchtime, on the way to or from work, or in the short periods of stillness in the evening, is as good as a couple of hours decent sleep.

So, as you might imagine, I have been finding a quiet corner in my lunch hour and ignoring the strange looks I get in the car, so I can recharge my batteries with copious amounts of chanting. Though I can’t actually say that the accompanying prayers have an instant effect in an IT environment, boosting my practice at such times certainly does invigorate and rejuvenate my spirits. That has to be a good thing for all concerned.

That Friday Feeling

25 May 2012 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , , , , ,

Hello Darkness My Old FriendWell here we are again folks, another week older and deeper in debt, or so a poor paraphrase of the song would go. Another day spent in Newbury has taken us a lot closer to completing the repair of Fraser’s and me a day nearer to getting my Bumble back.

I’m still struggling with the feelings of inadequacy in terms of looking after B, and we actually had a few sharp words with each other when I tried to explain how I felt. It seemed that there was a conflict, with me wanting to help and wanting her to allow me to do so, and she not wanting to put me to any inconvenience. Of course I should have recognised the mutterings of The Dark Passenger, but sadly I didn’t until it was almost too late.

We came to a sensible compromise, and when we spoke on Skype tonight, it seems that peace has broken out once more. I would like to think that listening to chapter 7, my favourite chapter of The Buddha, Geoff and Me got me thinking straight again. That and another serious chanting session on the way from Newbury to Bristol.

The day ended very pleasantly with a family meal round at Charlotte’s. Earlier in the day I just wasn’t feeling like talking to anyone, being in a low life-state and lacking life-energy. The chanting seems to work every time for me. I guess I should be getting used to that by now, but it still makes me smile when it does.

Nam Myoho Renge Kyo

Big Mistake

18 May 2012 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , , , , ,

Lotus_DSHaving felt that we were almost there with the new Fraser’s website last night, I was in for a horrible shock this morning. On the drive up to Newbury, I was blissfully unaware that the live site had been all but destroyed by a re-sync I ran yesterday evening.

During Tuesday afternoon, I had inadvertently uploaded a script that had reset most of the content on the staging server. Of course, nobody was any the wiser because until the sites were synchronised, the live site remained intact. As soon as I ran the sync, all the damage was transferred over to live, and frighteningly there is no concept of an ‘undo’ command.

As soon as I looked in my inbox and saw the mails reporting the state of the site I was plunged into hell-state. Although the software partners are working on a set of backup scripts, I knew they were unfinished and that all the copy, images, menus and navigation was lost.

Fortunately, and to my huge relief, Bully had a data snapshot, albeit from February. That was the starting point for an entire day’s work, trying to cherry pick the latest elements from a whole morass of ancient code. Without the expert help of our partners, and Bully in particular, we, and by that I mean I, would have been in a very real mess. By about 5:00pm we were pretty much back where we should be. Thanks a million Bully.

So the drive from Newbury to Bristol was taken at a very leisurely pace, with a lot of chanting, while I tried to restore my life-state back to one of the higher worlds. It took a while, way past Swindon in fact, but finally my life-energies were on the rise. It’s strange how certain incidents can lower your energy, almost in an instant, but it can take a lot of chanting to get them back up again.

At least with my practice, I have a method to control them. Prior to practicing Nichiren Buddhism, I would have been in hell-state for a long time. By chanting, I raised them quite quickly, and I guess that had a good effect on both Bumble and myself as we sat and discussed the debacle over dinner. I know that I haven’t heard the last of this mistake, but at least I am in a good state to rationalise the incident, document the error and make plans to ensure that it never happens again. Nam Myoho Renge Kyo.

Tranquillity

08 May 2012 2 Comments

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , ,

TranquillityOfficially, today was Tuesday, but in computer speak it was actually Monday++. With the extra day off, the weekend just meant that the pile of work waiting for me when I got into the office this morning was 50% bigger than a normal Monday, and you know how I feel about them. So it was all hands on deck and the day passed without a break, ironically at break-neck speed.

So by the time 5:00 o’clock arrived I was in need of some peace and quiet. Fortunately, the stream behind the office is exactly the right place to find such an environment, so before diving into the car and setting off for MQ, I took several long minutes to just stand and chant in the evening sunshine, watch the quiet waters flow past, and let my mind find its equilibrium as the trials and tribulations of the day drifted away with the shining lazy current.

If we are to deal with the challenges of every day life, it is important to take a deep breath, inhale the quieter side of life, and release the stress that builds up inside. Next time you find yourself feeling agitated, stressed out, or getting submerged beneath the everyday strains that life puts upon us, find a quite spot, take time to stand still and just let those anxieties drift away.

Far from being a waste of time, they may be the most important minutes of your day.

A Soggy Symbolic Saturday

28 Apr 2012 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , , ,

Buddha In My Coffee CupWhere is all this rain coming from? Apparently, it is officially the wettest drought on record, and looking out of the cottage window this morning it’s not surprising. The raindrops are hammering on the windows, powered on by a blustery north wind.

The morning started strangely. We were supposed to be meeting B’s mum, aunt and sister and brother in law at a bank on Whiteladies Road in Clifton at 10:30 and we were there, or thought we were, just before 10:00. Sadly, it was the wrong branch, so a 15 minute route march ensued when we realised, to get to the right one in Queen’s Road.

It would appear that despite, or maybe as a result of, the financial sector meltdown, that good old fashioned red tape is still very much in evidence. So while B, Sue and their mum jumped through all manner of hoop to sort out the administration, Auntie Wendy and I slipped quietly away to Costa for a caffeine top-up.

Funny how your life-state influences your view of things, or maybe not. The principle of the oneness of self and the environment means that you influence the people and things around you. So when an image of Buddha appeared on the top of my Latte, I suppose it shouldn’t have come as a surprise.

That Friday Feeling

27 Apr 2012 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , , ,

TGIFWell it’s taken a whole week to get here, but finally Friday has arrived again. I know what you are saying, you were going to fill every minute, of every day, with sixty seconds of gainful employment, and I have. But doing that doesn’t stop me being pleased that, arguably, the best day of the week has put in a much appreciated appearance at last.

The weather looks like it’s going to be pants over the weekend, but that can’t stop us having fun if we are determined to make the most of our days off. Every weekend starts for me with a drive to Bristol, as you have probably realised by now, but even that has it’s plus points. Beautiful countryside and fabulous views of some amazing buildings, to name just two.

With a full agenda already pencilled in for both Saturday and Sunday, tonight is going to be a bit of R & R round at Charlotte and Rob’s, with the added promise of a Domino’s stuffed crust Hot ‘n Spicy pizza thrown in for good measure. So please don’t go telling B, she’ll give me hell.

It was a funny old week up to Wednesday, but having realised that I was wishing the days away, put me in a good place to boost my life-energies through chanting and that raised my life-state. Being in one of the higher worlds really does put a sunny outlook on everything and everyone, so I hope you managed to join me, and that you too are going to have a really great weekend.

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