Careful Setting Those Expectations

Careful Setting Those ExpectationsWe all set expectations, of ourselves, of others and of the outcome of situations in our lives.

So it is very easy to be disappointed when those expectations are not met.

What you must remember, is that your happiness is in your own hands, so being unhappy when your hopes and expectations are dashed is your own decision.

In my case, I find that taking some quiet time to examine why I am disappointed solves a lot of these problems. Sometimes my own expectations are set too high, unrealistic even, sometimes the simple acceptance that those expectations are not those of others explains the outcome.

Allowing your expectations of others to be, even in part, the basis of your happiness shows a lack of Wisdom, so learn from the pain, don’t repeat the mistake, and move on.

This is, of course, far easier to say than to do. But to help maintain your happiness, set realistic expectations for yourself and accept that failing to meet those expectations does not mean failing completely.

Managing Expectations

Great Expectations Miss Havisham?We all live with hopes and expectations, of ourselves, of others, and of the outcome of situations in our lives, and it is all too easy to be disappointed when those expectations are not fully met.

However, you must also remember, that your happiness is in your own hands, so being unhappy when your expectations are dashed, is your own decision.

In my own experience, I find that taking some quiet time to examine why I am disappointed helps to solve the problem. Sometimes, upon reflection, my expectations are too high, even unrealistic you might say, sometimes the simple acceptance that my expectations are not those of others explains the outcome.

But allowing your expectation of others to be, even in part, the basis of your own happiness shows a lack of wisdom, so learn from the pain, don’t repeat the mistake and move forward.

So to help maintain your happiness, set realistic and flexible expectations for yourself and of others, and accept that failing to meet those expectations does not mean failing altogether.

Disappointment

Determination_BoulderThe people who are closest to us are the people we can hurt the most. With the best will in the world and with the very best intentions, a wrong word or deed can sometimes cause them a whole world of pain.

Being in the position of being responsible for supporting someone is a full time role, there’s no time off, no period during which one can let things slide. So when a conversation suddenly goes awry because of a thoughtless comment or reaction, the disappointment can be felt by both sides.

The result is like someone who is distracted whilst trying to push a boulder uphill. They have worked tirelessly to get it higher and higher up the hill. But the instant they relax their effort, or take their eye off the ball, the boulder starts back down to the bottom again.

In the same way, the trust and relationship you have worked so hard to nurture can suddenly takes a U turn and you can find yourself back where you were. Not only is that disappointing, but it’s quite possible that the damage caused could change things forever.

So be mindful. If you are putting yourself in a position where your support is important, be aware of the responsibility it entails. Be self-aware, show determination, compassion and resilience and be prepared to keep on giving, no matter what the circumstances.

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