What A Gray Day

25 Jan 2011 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , ,

Gray SackedThe rumblings over Sky TV’s Andy Gray and Richard Keys, regarding the comments about a female referee’s assistant, have reached a crescendo today when it was revealed that Gray had been videoed making other sexist comments to a female colleague.

Sky have sacked Gray for inappropriate conduct and he deserves that. Whilst he was Sky’s most senior soccer pundit, that kind of conduct is totally unacceptable.

His knowledge of the game was excellent and he and Keys dissected games, post match, to explain how they had been won and lost. That must show a Wisdom of sorts, but his comments also show a complete lack of Wisdom when it comes to his bigoted views about women.

Having the Wisdom, Courage and Compassion to make the most of our lives is a continuous process. It involves learning, through reading and listening, and it is worthwhile and rewarding in so many ways.

Personally I won’t miss Mr Gray’s commentaries and I know I won’t be alone in feeling that. He was a good player, with a long and successful career, but all that will be forgotten now. For that, I feel sorry for him. An acute lack of common sense, or Wisdom, regarding his code of conduct, has destroyed a reputation that has taken him years to build.

We should all have the courage to show him some compassion and he, in turn, should show the Wisdom, Courage and Compassion to make a public apology to all the women he has verbally abused over the years.

Something And Nothing

20 Jan 2011 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags:

Castles-In-The-AirLast week, I thought I had something, everything my heart desired. This week I found I have nothing.

When we create illusions in our own heads, castles in the air as it were, we leave ourselves open to crushing disappointments. It is only when the illusion has been blown away, like the morning mist, that our vision becomes clear.

Please take my advice, examine situations for what they are, rather than what you hope they are.

The fall from a castle in the air is long and scary, and worse still, it ends with a very painful bump.

Get It Sorted

16 Jan 2011 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: ,

Grrrrr !!!Have you ever had a problem or situation that has been there for a while, but you can’t drum up the enthusiasm to fix? I know you have, we all have.

Maybe enthusiasm is not the right word, maybe confidence is a better one. Maybe you should have made a phone call or gone to meet someone, but you know they aren’t going to be too pleased to hear from you when you do.

When I say you know, it’s probably more accurate to say you imagine, you suppose, see what I mean? We all build up little scenarios in our heads, and the more often we think about the problem, the more convinced we become, that our imagined outcome is what will actually happen.

This is where we need a bit of Wisdom, Courage and Compassion.

We need the Wisdom to see that what we imagine is the version of events from our point of view, and may be way off. We also need to accept that any problem that is left to fester, will only get worse and never go away by itself.

We need a deal of Courage to put ourselves into a situation that may be awkward, embarrassing or painful (hopefully not physically). Picking up that phone, or ringing that door bell, when we are unsure of the reception, takes guts. But remember that the alternative may be even worse.

Now we need a huge dollop of Compassion. The fact that we have put off doing something about this issue probably means that we feel that we are in the wrong, in some way. So we need to steel ourselves for a potential tirade, whilst remaining calm and sympathetic. We need to understand the problem from the other persons point of view. That will take a dialogue of some nature, and maintaining a compassionate nature may help defuse the situation. We need to bite our tongue when we may feel like giving a little back. I don’t mean a complete capitulation, more a flexible approach to understanding their side of things.

I imagine that each and every person who reads this has an issue, be it large or small, that falls into this category. Only you know what it is, so gird your loins, take a deep breath, and get it sorted today. You’ll feel a lot better when you do, believe me, I know from experience.

Nam Myoho Renge Kyo

The Last Word

15 Jan 2011 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags:

LotusNo matter the situation, make sure that the last thing you say is not something, you or the person you say it to, will regret for the rest of your life.

We’ve all been there, a disagreement or a heated moment, where we’ve said something we later regretted. Imagine if that were the last conversation we ever had with that person, it could leave a shadow hanging over you forever.

In terms of karma, it’s never going to be in the plus column, is it.

So whatever you may be feeling, however the situation will be left, you can always find something positive, kind or caring with which to end the conversation. What’s the worst that can happen? It may be the last chance you ever have to say it, so have the Wisdom, Courage and Compassion to make it constructive.

Namaste

Inner Strength

14 Jan 2011 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , ,

BuddhaBefore I became aware of Nichiren Buddhist, through Jason and Karen Jarrett’s A Buddhist Podcast initially, I found disappointments very difficult to handle.

I have always been prone to setting my expectations too high, and that leads to disappointment when the expectation isn’t met. My Dad, on the other hand, always seemed to be a little pessimistic, he never appeared to have very high expectations, never got overexcited about anything, so didn’t allow himself to feel disappointment, or that was the way it looked to me.

Since I have been practicing Nichiren Buddhism I have an inner strength that helps me through difficult times. It is a great comfort and I would recommend it to anyone who is struggling with issues or problems.

The strange thing is that Buddhism doesn’t always make the problems go away, although that does sometimes happen, but it gives me a different way of looking at the situation and a focus that makes the problems more easy to understand and to bear.

In general, my life has been very easy. I have a very loving family, great parents and had a very stable home life in my formative years. I’ve been through a few troughs, the usual things like losing my grandparents, my father and failed relationships, the same as every one else. I’m not looking to test my practice to that extent, but I truly believe that my inner strength will see me able to cope with such times much better now.

If I were to try to pinpoint the single most important reason for this, I would say it was a new found mental calm. I’ve never been a fighter. At school I used to use humour to get out of the usual scrapes all kids get into. But I was prone to letting my feeling show, particularly when disappointment was involved.

Now, because I can see the situation from all angles, just like those reviews on the web, where you can spin the item around and look at it every which way, I can rationalise more easily. Being able to see a situation from other peoples perspective allows me to make sense of how things appear to them, and understand why they are reacting in the way they are.

It has changed my life, or at least the way I look at it, and it can help anyone. Maybe it could help you.

A Predictable Outcome

13 Jan 2011 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , ,

ballotAs I write this, there is a huge furore over the outcome of the Oldham by-election.

My question is, why? With the Coalition having to put the country through the financial mill, for pretty good reasons, you could have bet your shirt on the result.

In these kinds of by-elections, the people take the opportunity to give the Government a good kicking, safe in the knowledge that it won’t bring about any major change.

Let’s remember who put these politicians in power in the first place. We voted them in, because the alternative was even less palatable, and gave them the mandate to steer The Good Ship UK for a while.

We are all responsible for our own Karma, the result of all our actions, in this and previous lives, is where we are now. Both individually and collectively, we must take responsibility for those actions and understand that the outcome is our own doing.

So don’t moan when the results of your actions are not quite how you imagined they would be. If we want things to change, we must take the actions for that to happen.

Making Your Dreams Come True

08 Jan 2011 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , ,

There are some things in life that are worth the suffering involved in attaining them. Your dreams are included, if not top of that list.

Wisdom, Courage and CompassionIt has been said that the things that come easily are never worth as much as those that take time and effort. Think back to your own achievements, I’m sure you will see that the things that bring the most pride and enjoyment are the ones that took the most work to come to fruition.

So let’s examine just what qualities we will need in order to succeed.

In the first place it may well take a great deal of Courage. The Courage to persist under difficult conditions, to make difficult decisions. Often we have to make sacrifices to achieve the greater goal and that also takes Courage. Sometimes we might be tempted to give in, when the pain seems to be too great. The Courage to go on, to reach that goal, will repay us many times over when we succeed.

To ensure that you are making the right decisions along the way will take Wisdom. Maybe we make mistakes and Wisdom is exhibited in the way we learn from those mistakes. At other times the Wisdom is apparent in the way we take the hardest option for the right reason.

Finally we need to have Compassion. There will be times when we have to live through short term pain for long term gain, and Compassion for ourselves and for the others involved will make the process so much easier for everyone to bear.

I don’t need to cite any examples, we have all got life experiences that illuminate the process very clearly. I wish you all the Wisdom, Courage and Compassion to aim for, and attain your own dreams. Remember it can all be made easier by following the Buddhist principle of Kyo Chi Gyo I, it is the recipe for success.

Nam Myoho Renge Kyo.

How Very Sad

04 Jan 2011 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , ,

Salman TaseerI was very sad to hear of the assassination of the Pakistan politician, Salman Taseer today, as reported by the BBC.

The incident was sad on many levels. A man showing such Wisdom, Courage and Compassion in expressing his disagreement at the death sentence handed to a Christian woman for the crime of blasphemy, was a breath of fresh air in a world of dogmatic doctrine.

He was murdered by his own bodyguard, a man whom he trusted with his life, literally.

The stated aim of Nichiren Buddhism is Kosen-Rufu, World peace through individual happiness. Not by the conversion of every human being to Buddhism, but by the teaching of the ways and means of promoting happiness through correct thought and deed.

A man like Salman Taseer was a great example to us all. Through his stand against, what he said were, “Illiterate Clerics” as well as the blasphemy case, had knowingly put himself in danger. He has paid the ultimate worldly price for his courage.

The cause of Kosen-Rufu has been sadly set back a step by this senseless murder.

Patience Is A Virtue

30 Dec 2010 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags:

Having the patience, with a person or situation, to see things through to their conclusion takes Wisdom, Courage and Compassion.

The Wisdom to see that the desired path is both achievable and the correct outcome.

The Courage to stick to your path, despite setbacks or obstacles.

The Compassion to see things from all viewpoints, whether they agree with yours or not.

The one big problem with being patient, is that you never know what the outcome will be until it’s happened.

Time will tell.

Wisdom, Courage and Compassion

21 Dec 2010 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags:

Lotus SutraSometimes the lessons we learn in life are put into practice sooner than we would like.

The tragic and unexpected death of a colleague’s sister-in-law today tested my wisdom and compassion, all too soon after our own loss.

My colleague was understandably distraught at the shock news. The circumstances were exacerbated by the weather, the festive season and the fact that she had to find the courage to take control of the situation for the sake of the family.

If this had happened a few months ago I wouldn’t have been as prepared, mentally or spiritually and I have my Practice to thank for that.

I am well aware that dealing with the death of a close family member is very different to helping a friend cope with their own loss. But I am confident that my certainty of the eternity of life has taken away the fear of death and allows me to look at such situations with a more logical, rather than emotional, state of mind.

Of course I will chant and pray for my colleague and her family and their collective courage.

Nam Myoho Renge Kyo

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