You Have My Support

10 Jul 2012 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , , , ,

Apple TreeAt the back of our office, there is a small grass area surrounded by a wilderness of brambles and wild flowers. Last year, someone planted a very small apple tree which has a short piece of aluminium tubing next to it as a support.

Over the winter, and indeed into much of the spring, the tree was doing a very good impression of a dead twig. No leaves, no signs of life at all. But with the slowly rising temperatures, and all the rain, it has sprouted and is growing nicely.

The aluminium stake is only there to help the tree survive the worst of the weather, the wind and storms. It does not help the tree to grow, it is so loosely tied to the developing sapling that it does not influence it in any way, it just stands there and offers support when the tree needs it.

That is how we should be when we offer support to someone. We are not there to influence them or to change the way they are growing, just to provide additional strength when times get tough. We must show compassion when they go through growing pains, have wisdom to help them overcome their issues and use our courage when they lean on us.

Being their support brings it’s own challenges. We have to accept the path the the person we are supporting decides to take, whether it would be our choice or not. We must listen to what the person is saying, but not try to influence them or provide conflicting view points. We also have to have the strength to resist the forces that would otherwise cause us both to falter.

That is the role of a support. It’s not an easy role, but it does bring it’s own rewards. In time, like the tree, the person may in fact become stronger than us and no longer want or need our support. But the joy in seeing them grow and become strong is reward enough for the task undertaken.

Little Chef

04 Jul 2012 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , ,

Little ChefAsk anyone who knows me, I’m not the greatest cook on Earth, and openly admit it. But I’m always up for a challenge. So when I was told, before the holiday, that everyone was expected to cook an evening meal for the crew, my heart sank a little.

Bumble is a very kind lady, and she was as determined as I was, to turn me into a little chef, if only for one day. So before we set off to Shropshire, we put our heads together to come up with a meal that could be prepared in limited circumstances and with even more limited experience.

You might have thought, that having lived alone for a couple of years, I would have honed my culinary skills to perfection. Sadly that is not the case. I am fine at the simplest meals, beans on toast, the odd pasta dish, but nothing more taxing. That just wouldn’t cut it with the SAS, Steve is a rather fussy eater, as he’d openly admit, so we had to be a little creative.

B helped me make the choice. I had chicken breasts, soft cheese, a choice of herbs and spices and some rindless bacon. So I decided to make something tasty, a dish that would tickle the taste buds, and a sweet and spicy mix that would be easy, if not quick to prepare.

My chicken breasts, filled with soft cheese and diced chilli, glazed with mango chutney and wrapped in the bacon rashers turned out perfectly. Bumble was fair but firm with me, making sure that the timings were spot on, so the meat and the roast vegetables came together perfectly. The choice was decided and I was feeling much more confident, it tasted fantastic and B was very complimentary.

So tonight I had my chance to shine, but equipment failure looked set to scupper my efforts. The propane gas oven just wasn’t up to the challenge and stubbornly refused to get up to temperature. So with a lot of help from all concerned, the chicken was cooked using the tiny microwave and then finished off in a vaguely warm oven.

But though I say so myself, the dish turned out perfectly. The chicken, that could easily have come out as dry as a bone, was simply delicious. The parma  ham, that had been substituted for the bacon, held the parcels together as intended and the mango chutney worked wonderfully as a sweet glaze, contrasting and complimenting the spicy filling.

The whole experience was a bit of a trial, the equipment failures had put a lot of stress on the process. But with a great deal of help from Bumble, as well as very welcome support from Sue and Steve, it turned out well in the end.

So having met the challenge head on, having kept my cool, at least for some of the time, I’m rather proud of the outcome. We all experience challenges in life. Many, if not most of them, far more important than cooking a meal. But the lesson learned today was one of perseverance, determination, team work and self improvement, and it will serve me well, way into the future.

All Shapes And Sizes

03 Jul 2012 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , , , ,

Challenges Come In All Shapes And Sizes - Wrenbury lifting bridgeChallenges come in all shapes and sizes as we all know. However, few can come much bigger, physically, than the Wrenbury lifting bridge. A lifting bridge is, as you might imagine, a bridge that can be raised to allow the narrowboat to pass underneath. Unlike any other lifting bridge we encountered, this one had a fairly main road crossing it, and had to be controlled by hydraulics, rather than by winding.

As the newbie to cruising canals amongst our group, it was just another piece of canal hardware that needed to be learned, but no one else had seen this type of machinery either. So when I was despatched to open the bridge as we came into Wrenbury, I took a windlass and set off to crank away as usual.

However, there was a shock in store. No winding gear, no instructions at all, apparently, just a motley collection of battleship grey boxes next to the bridge. Finally I found the control panel. The instructions might as well have been in Egyptian hieroglyphics and the buttons to operate the hydraulics were hidden under a Perspex cover that had been lovingly polished with wire wool, making it almost opaque.

Then I realised that I needed the British Waterways key to activate the panel, and that was on the boat key ring, in the ignition, back on the boat, a hundred yards back up the canal. It also transpired that the barrier that blocked the open side of the canal, while the bridge was up, needed to be closed manually before anything else would function. A proper contender for a test on the Krypton Factor if ever there was one.

Fortunately, Steve, who had been in the shower when I left the boat, had now joined me on the towpath, so while he man-handled the barrier, I ran back to the boat to get the key. Together we got things sorted, the bridge opened, the ignition key was returned to the boat, and the challenge was met.

At the time, I was a little flustered by the whole episode. Not only did I feel that I had let my shipmates down a little by my incompetence, but I had also held up the traffic longer than was comfortable. But on reflection, and having talked through the debacle with the gang, I felt better about the situation.

When we meet new situations, we need to use a combination of wisdom, courage and compassion, in varying degrees. I would like to think, and the guys seemed to agree, that given the circumstances, I did ok. At least when we need to raise the bridge again on our way back, we will be better equipped to make a better job of it.

So another challenge met, another lesson learned, more poison turned into medicine and another step taken on the path to enlightenment.

Mondays – An Apology

11 Jun 2012 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , , ,

Fly Like An EagleI think, if you take a look back over the last few weeks and months, I’ve been a bit dismissive of the value of the first working day of the week. Well I’ve had a hard look at myself in the last couple of weeks and I think I owe them an apology.

To start with, it’s not their fault that they follow the weekend. Their name means Moon Day in Old English and I’m sure they wouldn’t have chosen to start the week. But with my rediscovered self-awareness I can honestly say that I was being unfair and trying to lay the blame for my failings at their door.

So having had a particularly productive day, and also been back in team mode, I can see that Mondays are no different to any other day of the working week and I apologise to them, unreservedly. It’s easy to see the mistake in hindsight, and is actually a good measure of progress towards enlightenment, or lack of it.

If you, like I, were feeling that Monday had got it in for you, or that the weekend was taking an eternity to arrive, it’s time to take a long hard look at yourself. It’s easy to blame others for the challenges we face, it’s much more difficult to accept that the blame is our own. But having done so, you have the freedom to break free from the self imposed restrictions and fly like an eagle once again.

Exquisite Pain

07 Mar 2012 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , ,

Look In The MirrorSelf awareness, the realisation of who, or what you really are, comes to some people with age, but for me, it came at a point in life where I was at my all time low. Seeing my true reflection in the mirror was a long and painful process, there’s no joy in realising that you are someone you don’t really like, but it lead me to the turning point that has allowed me to change for the better.

It is said that ‘we hate in others, what we refuse to see in ourselves’ and I suddenly understood what that meant. Things that annoy us about other people, are sometimes the very things in us that annoy others. Being honest enough with ourselves, to admit our failings or less attractive traits, can be the start of the process of self improvement.

In Nichiren Buddhism we refer to that process as Human Revolution, the nurturing and growth of self improvement through the acquisition of wisdom, courage and compassion. It is achieved, over time, through our practice and learning.

So next time, before you go criticising others, take a long, hard and honest look in that mirror, and have the courage to see the faults you are so desperate to hide from yourself. It will be a painful process, but you will emerge on the other side, like a butterfly emerging from the chrysalis, a better and more beautiful being for doing it.

Next Newer Entries