Buddhist Football

24 Apr 2012 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , , ,

uefa-champions-leagueThose of you who know me, even a little bit, will know that I am, and have been for longer than I care to remember, a Chelsea fan. Now this evening, I will be glued to the telly, watching a very important event taking place in Barcelona, namely the Champions League semi final, second leg.

Ok, I say important. Not as important as many, if not most other things in life, but an occasion of note let us say. Time was, when my lad and I would be glued to the telly, or at the match if we could get tickets, avid fans you might describe us.

If we won, we were happy, if we draw, less so, but if we lost … well, let’s not even go there. Sad to say, but when we lost, as Chelsea do occasionally, not only were we unhappy, but that made those around us unhappy too, crazy really.

I am pleased to say that I have come to terms with the situation. Winning is nice, losing not so nice, but it doesn’t put me into a bad place anymore. And that’s all down to re-anchoring my life, by making my Gohonzon my Honzon.

Life in general consists of an ever changing canvass of thoughts, words and deeds, a complete palette of emotions from the very happy to the very sad. But if you anchor your life on faith, and in my case that is obviously Buddhism, the changes have far less effect because you have a more stable base to work from..

It was the great Liverpool manager Bill Shankly who once said ‘Some people believe football is a matter of life and death, I am very disappointed with that attitude. I can assure you it is much, much more important than that. Shankly was indeed a great manager, but I’m afraid Bill, you got that wrong.

So if we, by whom I mean Chelsea, make it through to the final, I will be delighted. If we don’t, well it won’t be the end of the world, for me at least. In terms of the path to enlightenment, I guess I can chalk that up as a win either way.

Sash Windows, Stuff And Supper

21 Apr 2012 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , , , ,

Indian SupperSaturday morning and the sun was shining. The sash window restoration man arrived rather too promptly, but was good enough to sit in his van until we had finished breakfast. The friend of a friend, he has just started out on his own, so we were keen to give him some business if it all sounded plausible.

To be honest it didn’t start too well. The first thing he showed us was a cream plastic insert, used to allow the windows to be removed for painting. As B is allergic to plastic, ethically speaking, he was on a sticky wicket from the off. But he was a very nice chap and he’s going to quote to renovate the worst of the windows, so we’ll reserve judgement.

When he left, the sun was still shining intermittently, but the rain clouds were building, just as the weather people had predicted. So getting the ‘stuff’ out of the sun lounge and into the garage, and vice versa, took on an added importance. It’s never much fun trying to rearrange things when you and they have taken a good soaking.

Actually things turned out rather well. The rain, what there was if it, wasn’t too heavy and nor was the majority of the ‘stuff’, so good progress was made in both locations. The Yaris was parked in the driveway, ready to receive the charity shop donations. We had already delivered several boxes of books to the Amnesty International bookshop on the Gloucester Road, but there was much more ‘rationalisation’ to be done.

To be honest, it was a lot more fun than I had expected, and B was a bit more willing to part with some of the less important treasure than I had feared. The day flew by, both places gradually took on an air of organised pandemonium, and the Yaris filled with unwanted goodies.

Sadly the process took longer than anticipated, so there was no time to deliver said donations. We were both fairly pooped by the time we decided to call it a day, so when I made a tentative suggestion that we take our evening repast at the local Indian restaurant, it was accepted with much enthusiasm.

We walked round to the Raj Mahal, managing to dodge the early evening showers and had a very tasty selection of their excellent fare. Indian food has, in the past, not agreed with B’s constitution on the whole, but whatever had caused the problem in the past obviously wasn’t present this time, so by 10:30, both full to bursting, we retired for a well earned, and dyspeptic free night.

Silver Linings

20 Apr 2012 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , , ,

Salisbury CathedralIt’s Friday evening and the weekend is here. The drive up to Bristol started rather slowly. The rain we have been waiting for has arrived at last, and it was really pouring down as I set off from the office. Something told me that the journey was going to be difficult.

Driving up the A36 was going well, the rain stopped and the traffic was light, maybe my fears would be unfounded. Then I came round a bend a couple of miles outside Salisbury and saw a queue to end all queues.

The progress was painfully slow, no sign of the cause, maybe just the Friday rush hour at it’s worst. But then, coming over the crest of a hill, I was treated to an amazing sight. The magnificent Salisbury cathedral, across the fields, so beautiful.

I’ve seen the view many, many times, but tonight I was sitting in stationary traffic, so I had time to take a photograph. And although I don’t agree with all aspects of the Christian religion, they have given us some of the most amazing architecture.

So as with all challenges in life, every cloud has a silver lining. The trick is to keep an eagle eye open for it, and make the most of it when it appears.

An Alternative View

14 Apr 2012 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , , , , , ,

An Alternative ViewAs you might expect, my Gohonzon has it’s own special place in my apartment and although that isn’t the only place I chant, it doesn’t come with me when I travel around. Although chanting isn’t always done alone, being in a strange place, as in new to me,  requires me to seek out a little secluded spot to practice.

Last night, through all the thunder and lightning, B and I headed off to her aunt’s house in a little village just outside Totnes in Devon. We arrived late and the place was as dark as could be, no street lights and no moon because of the clouds, so I didn’t get to see the view until this morning.

To say that it was breath-taking would be an understatement. Beautiful rolling countryside as far as the eye could see, and all bathed in beautiful sunshine. I was trying to be a little quiet and so had delayed my morning practice until I could slip quietly away. After breakfast, B and her aunt went out into the garden to inspect the plethora of unusual plants growing there, and seeing the opportunity, I made my getaway.

The South facing picture window in our bedroom was the perfect vista to substitute for my absent Gohonzon, so while the ladies were outside, I stood and looked at the view and chanted. They say that variety is the spice of life, and I can concur with that view. Chanting in new and interesting places is fun, energy-giving and powerful, and as usual, I felt my life-energies rising as I chanted. So much so, that I am even tempted to start a new section of the blog, dedicated to photos of my experiences.

Nam Myoho Renge Kyo

Just Be Grateful

13 Apr 2012 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , ,

Just Be GratefulWe all know one. The person you dread meeting by the coffee machine. The one who never has a good word to say about anything. Who when you ask them how they are, gives you a list of all the things wrong with them, never a positive word about anything or anyone. A proper drain on your energies.

We’ve got someone here at work, a lady who’s been here for ages, who’s part of the furniture, who thinks that she’s the cog that keeps the whole place running. She’s in sales, and when I was introduced to her a while ago said ‘Always remember, I’m the one who pays your wages’. I’m sure you know the sort.

As you might expect, she not the most popular member of staff, the one who is missed when she’s on holiday because the atmosphere in the office is that much more joyful. Nobody has a good word to say about her, and she’s avoided by everyone if at all possible.

But it got me thinking. She’s unhappy most of the time, unless she’s just made a large sale, and she’s intent on bringing everyone else down to her level. So there’s an expectation set, that she’ll be grumpy, or rude, or both when I have to deal with her. So I have decided to get my infinite compassion ray ready, to try to make her feel better about whatever she is complaining about. I smile when I’m talking to her, and always try to leave the conversation on a positive note.

I look at it this way. I have to cross her path once in a while, and that can be challenging. But she has to live with herself all the time, and she’s unhappy, so how does she feel about things? So I’ve been quietly putting the compassion idea around to see if we can’t all help her, help herself, to be a little more jovial, and with me at least, it seems to be working.

If you have someone you know who fits the same mould, maybe you might try a little compassion too. You never know, it might just change the way they view you, given the principle of oneness of self and the environment. A little extra love never goes amiss, so give it a try and be prepared to see the change, and just be grateful that it’s not you I’m writing about.

Unconditional Love

11 Apr 2012 1 Comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , , ,

Unconditional LoveLoving, and being loved is really great isn’t it? There is little to compare with the feeling one gets from being part of a loving relationship, but there are two types of love, unconditional and conditional. Unconditional love is about giving without limits, about being happy for the happiness of others. Conditional love, on the other hand, can be painful for both parties. Elements of jealousy, or the need to be loved in order to love, can lead the way to a painful end of the relationship.

Buddhism defines love as an action. It is that force that motivates people to become better, to improve themselves in order to reach eternity and happiness. Love brings out the best in people, as when they love, the target is not themselves but the beloved one. This wish to serve the other is a reflection of an innate knowledge that everyone is connected through the same principle, and therefore, it is an illusion to believe that one can achieve true happiness while those around haven’t attained it . So, love is the action that makes people forego their own ego and concentrate their efforts on the other in a search for fulfilment.

Personally, I have been criticised for suggesting that, if my partner would be happier with someone else, that I would not stand in their path. That feeling, I believe, shows that I love them unconditionally and, arguably, more than someone who wants to control or confine them. It does not mean that I want them to go, just that I want them to be happy, and that my happiness is found through their happiness.

Achieving unconditional love is hard. So many people feel that they need to be loved to be happy. In fact, the most happiness comes from loving another, and the need to be loved is often a sign of insecurity. Loving unconditionally requires a totally unselfish attitude to the other. Being happy when they are happy, being happy for them when they succeed, rather than feeling jealous of their success. Keeping those negative feelings in check requires constant effort, but the happiness gained from so doing is unbounded.

So take a look at your motives next time you tell that special someone that you love them. Will you still love them if that love is not reciprocated? Are you happy for them when they find pleasure in something that is of no interest to you? Would you sacrifice the relationship if that added to their happiness? If the answer to any of those questions is no, then you are not loving unconditionally.

It is not the end of things if you are not, there is always time to change. Loving everyone, in the broadest sense of the word, is a very rewarding way to lead your life. Being concerned for the happiness of someone who clearly has no time for you is tough. Going the extra mile to ensure that the happiness of another at the expense of yourself is not necessarily a natural thing to do, but the rewards for doing so are great indeed.

So next time you say ‘I love you’ to someone, try mentally tagging on ‘no matter what’ to that phrase and see how that makes you feel inside. If you can honestly say that it makes no difference to you saying it, then you have reached the state of unconditional love and that will reward you every time you say it.

The World Of Learning

07 Apr 2012 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , ,

The Basket of Magical TreasuresAnother day, another grandson, today we were blessed by a visit from Zach and his Daddy Rob. Rob is a qualified chippy, and had very kindly offered to shave the bottom off two doors, so they would close after the carpet fitting.

It was the first time B had met either of them, so cordial greetings were exchanged in the customary manner. Zach was thirsty, so he was offered the chance to look in the special cupboard where all the squash and fruit juices live. A bottle of pink grapefruit squash caught his eye and he was soon guzzling a glass of it.

Rob and I needed to crack on with the doors, so B took Zach into the lounge to play. Zach was very interested in B’s Basket of Magical Treasures and he spent a lovely time learning all about the rocks and pebbles, crystals and horn, although the myriad of bubbles in a piece of lava was apparently described as ‘disgusting’.

Sadly, once the doors were finished, the two boys had to get back home, but I think the learning process benefitted all concerned, and Zach left with a bottle of his granddad’s pink grapefruit squash for later.

What A Good Good Friday

06 Apr 2012 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , ,

Stanley Takes A Power NapAfter a breakfast of toasted hot cross buns, we had a proper lazy start. We took a trip to a local electronics showroom to survey the lie of the land regarding a flat screen telly for the kitchen. Unfortunately, we had to have a couple of demonstrations of 3D TVs, so it was past noon before we dropped into Hannah’s to deliver young Stanley’s Easter Egg.

Hannah and Jay were in the middle of clearing the old house in preparation for the new tenants to move in next week, so we offered to take Stanley for a while to help them get on with the job. Stanley seemed quite keen, so with him strapped into his car seat in B’s Yaris, we set off to hunt for lions in deepest B & Q.

Now young Stanley is only two and a half, so I had imagined that keeping him amused was going to be a simple matter. How mistaken can one grandparent be? At first we made up little games to distract him from 40,000 square meters of shiny playthings, but he soon had the measure of us.

Unless I am much mistaken, we have a future 100 meter world champion in the family. For such a little chap, he’s got a fierce turn of speed, and when allied to his ultra low centre of gravity, he’s almost impossible to catch on the slippery store flooring. We had to put him in charge of the wheeled basket just to slow him to a catchable pace.

By the time we left the store, a good hour later, he was still raring to go, whereas we were all set for a nice sweet cup of tea and a snooze. But just as we were dreading another rendition of ‘Old MacDonald Had A Farm’, said nipper went all quiet and we found on closer inspection, that he had beaten us to the snooze.

We popped over to see B’s mum, and stayed a little while, but Stan The Man resolutely slept on. It was only when the car stopped outside Hannah’s just after 5:00pm, that the little chap stirred at all. As we left to head home for dinner, we were both feeling a bit pooped, but agreed that it had been a really good, Good Friday.

The Perfect Day

01 Apr 2012 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , , , ,

The Breakfast PartySo we’ve come to the last day of our holiday, and maybe we could have been rueing its passing, but today has been the very best of Sundays. With an early start in order to have the croissants ready for the arrival of Charlotte, Hannah and Oliver, we were delighted to see that the weather was still as beautiful as it had been all week.

We, or should I say I, demolished said croissants in pretty short order whilst Oliver consumed his apple puree. Washed down with lashings of hot coffee and plenty of good humoured banter, it was a perfect start to a perfect day.

Being made mostly of stone, the cottage is a bit like a fridge at times, so we decided to decamp to the garden and avail ourselves of the glorious sunshine. Garden chairs were erected and arranged and the jollifications continued. The garden is in need of a bit of TLC, but actually it fits perfectly into the higgledy piggledy style of a cottage garden. The birds and bees were in evidence, making themselves busy with their comings and goings.

Proceedings came to an end around 11:00 following the now obligatory photo session to record the event. With Oliver safely strapped into his child seat, the girls set off for home and we set off to find a few more ‘essentials’ for the guest bedroom. It was a fruitless search. Even a bit of light-hearted haggling failed to prise a rather nice, but far too expensive chest of drawers from the current owner, so we were home again by 1:00.

The Grove Wood Action Group, of whom Steve, the next door neighbour is advocate, were planning a walk from Shell Cottage, down to Grove Wood, in celebration of their successful prevention of the desecration of the wood by a local developer. Dressed in pseudo medieval and animal costumes, they made a colourful procession through the village and down the the entrance to the woods, where a ceremonial cutting of a ribbon took place.

Spirits were understandably high and much mirth and merriment accompanied the walk through the woods following the ceremony. The fact that, for us, it was a surprise event, only added to the fun and frivolity and we were happy to help by recording the occasion for posterity.

So a perfect end to a perfect and very enjoyable holiday. The weather, the events and particularly the company made it a thoroughly memorable time. Most pleasant.

Fuelling The Fury

31 Mar 2012 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , ,

Yummy Cakes in Coffee#1What a conundrum, I had enough petrol to get back to Bristol, to get B back home in time for her to go to work on Monday, but probably not enough to then get back to Ringwood. With the petrol panic still in full flow, should I drive around, using precious petrol, on the off chance I might stumble across a filling station with petrol, or just go for broke and head off to Somerset?

Having seen the CLOSED signs everywhere round Poole, there didn’t seem much mileage in embarking on a search, so we packed our bags and headed off towards Blandford. All the supermarket forecourts were empty, apart from the army of traffic cones, indicating that the priceless hydrocarbon nectar was non-existent. We pressed on, trying to eek as many miles out of each and every drop of fuel.

Having done the Bristol run, many, many times, I knew of a little filling station on the A360 in Longbridge Deverill, and sure enough it came up trumps. No queues, plenty of petrol and a public loo to boot. The price was a little more than I am used to pay, but considering our plight, we were only too happy to pay it.

So it just goes to show. If you can keep your cool, remain calm and collected whilst those about you are running (or driving) around like headless chickens, almost any situation can be overcome. With a full tank of petrol, and an empty bladder, we were back our way again, non the worse for the experience.

Just to further sweeten the trip, we took a minor detour into Keynsham to share a mini cheesecake and a slice of carrot cake in Coffee#1. After a short bimble round the shops for bread and fresh veggies, we got back onto the A4 and trundled back to Stapleton.

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