Feelings Of Guilt

21 May 2012 2 Comments

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , , ,

Spilled MilkEver had that feeling, that even though you have done your very best, that it just isn’t good enough? Well I’ve been feeling that all day, partly because of the mess I’ve made of the Fraser’s website, but mainly because B missed her ferry by 10 minutes, after I helped her plan the route and timings for the journey.

So I’ve been giving myself a hard time today. Trying to figure out a way to repair the website and wondering what I can do to help Bumble, stuck in Cornwall. I’ve chanted for both, and I think that has brought clarity, but I’m still not in any position to fix either properly.

Being in a relationship, be that personal or working, brings with it responsibility, we all know that. But there are certain times, certain incidents, that bring home that sense of responsibility into sharper focus.

There is nothing I can do in the current situation, other than remain focussed and concentrate on avoiding future mistakes. I can also stop beating myself up, crying over spilled milk as it were, and look to the future and ways to make amends.

Feelings Of Guilt

24 Aug 2011 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , ,

Work's EmailToday was the first day of my holiday, restful and relaxing, but tinged with feelings of guilt. Why would that be you may ask. Well all day, my smartphone has been pinging in response to incoming emails landing in my work’s inbox.

Ok, so I’m not doing anything wrong, my holiday was booked weeks ago and I left the office in a manageable state. But being in charge of the company website, dealing on a daily basis with client enquiries and responding to any issues, I am used to being involved and the feelings of responsibility don’t just evaporate.

So when I got a text this afternoon, telling me that the website was down, it left me wondering what was wrong. Of course, the boys in the office had it all under control and there was no need for concern. But it’s my ‘baby’ and I needed to know that the issue was being addressed.

I’m happy to say that I managed to overcome the guilty feelings, to the extent that I had a lovely afternoon lying on a lounger, in the sunshine, listening to a really good audio book. In my defence, I am happy to admit that I have ‘popped’ into my mailbox a few times during the day, so even though I’m on holiday, work is out of sight, but not out of mind.