Bite Your Tongue

30 Nov 2011 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , ,

Bite Your TongueSome situations just get stuck, they just refuse to offer a resolution, be that through indecision, lack of control or reluctance to move on.

Having the patience, with a person or situation, to see things through to their conclusion takes Wisdom, Courage and Compassion for the following reasons:

  • The Wisdom to see that the desired path is both achievable and the correct outcome.
  • The Courage to stick to your path, despite setbacks or obstacles.
  • The Compassion to see things from another’s viewpoint, whether it agrees with yours or not.

One big problem with being patient, is that you never know what the outcome will be until it’s happened. We shall see.

A Day Of Reflection

23 Nov 2011 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , , , ,

Mirror MirrorBack on my own again, and time to think, to get everything in place and to take stock. Being alone isn’t all bad. It does give me the space for introspection and that is a very healthy thing. Having the peace and quiet to chant is also the perfect environment to put my thoughts in order.

A nice bike ride in the autumn sunshine and the brisk air also gets the grey matter working again. Working hard forces the blood to flow and the heart to pound, both a great way to make me feel alive. Burning the excess calories of the last few days gives a feeling of satisfaction and makes all the effort worthwhile.

So my mind is clear, my decision is made and all that remains is to deliver the verdict. That isn’t going to be the most fun, but I know it will bring a sense of closure. At least, only being half way through my week of relaxation, I still have time to get life back on the right track and settle back onto my path to self enlightenment.

No Man’s Land

22 Nov 2011 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , , ,

No Man's LandI have a strange feeling of being in limbo, again. Whilst I enjoy having a visit from my friend, I always feel a sense of loss when it’s over. The worst bit being that it leaves me in a position of being unable to go back as well as being unable to move forward, so I’m stuck. I am also on holiday for the week, and although I can keep in touch with happenings in the office, my input is not required, so yet again, I feel like a fish out of water.

So as I have said before, on several occasions, I have to be honest and make a decision that might not be well accepted by all concerned. It has to be the right decision, both for me now, and for the future. That might sound simple, but believe me, it isn’t. So I have to sit and chant, to get my head and heart in the right place, and then evaluate the situation in order to make a logical choice. I’m still not in that position, so I don’t know which way to go.

This Time

21 Nov 2011 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: ,

HonestyWhen you find yourself in a situation where you have to decide what happens next, you must be completely honest, with everyone concerned, including yourself. When that decision is possibly not what others expect or want, you must be compassionate when you announce it.

Of course you can hurt others if when your decision is contrary to theirs, but you will hurt them more by delaying or by going along with them, just to go with the flow. Eventually, your feelings will show and the result will only be more angst for all.

So when you feel that you have to make a decision that will be difficult for others to accept, make it quickly, announce it gently but firmly, and reduce the pain, to you and those affected, to the minimum.

Having made the decision you must stick to it. There can be no going back, and doing so only makes it worse for everyone concerned.

Honesty – The Best Policy

24 Sep 2011 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , ,

HonestyWhen you find yourself in a situation where you have to decide what happens next, you must be completely honest, with everyone concerned, including yourself. When that decision is possibly not what others expect or want, you must be compassionate when you announce it.

Of course you can hurt others if when your decision is contrary to theirs, but you will hurt them more by delaying or by going along with them, just to go with the flow. Eventually, your feelings will show and the result will only be more angst for all.

So when you feel that you have to make a decision that will be difficult for others to accept, make it quickly, announce it gently but firmly, and reduce the pain, to you and those affected, to the minimum.

You Decide

18 Sep 2011 Leave a comment

by Anupadin in Buddhism Tags: , , ,

Fork In The RoadLife is a journey full of choices, for which we have to make decisions, and for which in turn, we are all accountable. Wouldn’t it be marvellous if there was a What-If machine, which you could use to play out each possible choice, see which one worked out best, and then make that your decision? Sadly there isn’t, nor will there ever be. So it is left up to us to make the best decision at the time, and then live with the consequences.

Of course, many of the decisions we make are of little consequence, tea or coffee, red or white wine, vote or abstain etc. none or these will, in all probability, change your life. But there are some decisions that, whichever way you decide, change the course of your life irrevocably. Not only that, but whatever you decide, you will never, ever know how things would have turned out had you made the opposite choice.

When I find myself faced with such a conundrum I chant, and chant and chant, until the possible outcomes are clear in my head, as well as all the reasons for why I might make each of the choices available, that I have identified all the pros and cons, I make the choice, and it is made with wisdom, courage and compassion. Once it’s made, there should be no going back. There is nothing worse than flip-flopping between decisions. It does no good, and can do a lot of harm, so stick to your guns.

Now I bet you are all wondering what this momentous decision is that I have to make. Well, thankfully, it’s not me having to make it, though it is one of the biggest of all life changing situations. I doubt that the person making the decision will even read this post, but if they do, I hope that reading it will help them come to terms with what they decide.

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